Secularize This

Tuesday, August 21, 2012

The Pursuit of Happiness

The hot topic on a lot of political burners today is the question on whether two consenting adults of the same gender have the right to get married.  A lot of the objection to same sex marriage comes from the religious moral majority stating that it does not jive with their holy doctrines.  Like it or not we live in a secular society giving people freedom from religious persecution, but to garner votes the right is pulling at the strings of the devout and standing on the platform of morality.  Other politicians are taking the stand that the states should be the ones that decide whether same sex marriage.

The problem with relying on the states to define marriage laws is that the United States contain 50 states and the citizens are free to move from state to state.  If two men who are married in a state that recognize same sex marriages and an employment opportunity comes up in a state that does not recognize same sex marriage then that happy couple has a more difficult decision to make than choosing to spend their lives together in a mutual partnership.  Do they choose to uproot their lives and move to a state where they lose their legal benefits of any married couple for a better employment opportunity or stay where they can be happy together?  It is a common sense situation being overly complicated by religiosity.

The Federal Government needs to recognize same sex marriages as a true marriage between two consenting adults, no more civil unions.  These people are choosing the partners they want to spend their lives with and should have access to equal benefits ans heterosexual couples do.  Having only seven out of fifty states recognizing same sex marriage truly limits these citizens as to where they are able to relocate and still have their freedoms.  Love and happiness are inalienable human rights and we as citizens in these United States need to stand up for ALL RIGHTS for the simple fact that if we allow our elected officials to determine who has rights and who does not, it is only a matter of time before they start infringing on your rights.  Interracial marriage was not accepted as legal throughout the union until 1967 with the Supreme Court ruling of Loving v. Virginia.  We are in the 21st Century, it is time to stop using Bronze Age text written by goat herders to influence modern doctrine.  Those same texts encouraged concubines, and now our modern society looks down on infidelity.  It is sad that people hide behind what their god "says" to influence their bigoted actions.

Our Founding Fathers stated that all men are created equal.  At the time that was written, slavery was thriving throughout our country, particularly in the South.  It was nearly a century after the Constitution was ratified that slavery was abolished (the same Bronze Age text was used to defend slavery as is used today to shun hate towards homosexuals) with the 13th Amendment to the Constitution.  The Constitution was written for the time and there have been 27 amendments to it in the 225 years of its existence showing that times change and societies change.  In 1789 when the new Constitution came into play, only white male land owners were allowed to vote and blacks had no vote, lucky if they had citizenship. Women were expected to be background figures, just like the Bible stated.  We live in a time of equality.  It is sad that people still hold prejudices and bigoted views after all the hate that has reigned down throughout human history.  It is time that we start living life for today and stop living life for the mythology of yesterday.

Monday, August 13, 2012


This past month the United States has produced two mass murders that have no place in a civilized society.  Dozens of innocent people were slain and families forever changed by the tragic events that took place in Colorado and Wisconsin.  I am not trying to take anything away from the families touched by the horrific actions of these two men that have forever shaken their worlds, but what puts these victims on a pedestal compared to the other murder victims that have their lives tragically taken on a daily basis in this great nation of ours?  Colorado had 12 lives taken in a midnight showing of "The Dark Knight Rises" and 58 injured.  Wisconsin had 5 lives shortened in a Sikh Temple, the gunman was also killed totaling 6 lives ending that day due to unneeded violence.  After these tragedies our government buildings and local business establishments lowered their flags to half mast showing respect for the victims and their families.

A total of 18 lives were taken in these two tragedies and our nation goes into honor mode immediately by lowering flags to half mast, but what actions are taken daily for those who have their lives cut short by mindless gun crimes?  According to the National Institute of Justice, there was 11,346 people killed by gun violence in 2005 averaging 31 lives lost every day that year.  How many times did our flags fly at half mast for those victims?  We tragically lose 18 victims over two different incidents and we show respect for isolated incidents performed by what appears to be mentally unstable individuals driven by psychosis or hate, but for the innocent people lost by stray bullets from drive by shootings, home invasions or even escalated domestic disputes are not given the same respect?  A life is a life, once it is gone it cannot be gotten back.

The answer is not more guns; that carries the same logic as using gasoline to put a fire out because it is a liquid like water.  If we are truly a civilized society we can thrive without firearms, but I know realistically that day will not come, so there will have to be other answers.  Education only goes so far, and we are a quick-tempered, gut instinct society that has a quick fuse and guns provide that superior feeling, especially when the other party does not have one.  Rather than gun control, there should be regulations on the ammunition.  Stop making it so easy to obtain these projectiles that inflict the damage.  Alcohol and tobacco cause damage to humans as well, and those industries are regulated.  There are stark differences between the use of alcohol/tobacco compared to firearms.  The people consuming alcohol/tobacco are making the conscious decision to partake in those products, and the harm they inflict are not instant.  The damages become apparent overtime.  Firearm victims have no choice in the damage that is inflicted upon them and the capacity for damage is far greater from a magazine of bullets compared to a carton of cigarettes or a fifth of whiskey.

Again, I mean no disrespect to the families of victims in Colorado and Wisconsin in these recent tragedies.  Any life lost is always tragic, especially in the face of ignorance and neglect.

Friday, August 3, 2012


Have your bowels ever been so impacted that you could not pass regularly?  Were you hesitant going to your pharmacy to buy an enema thinking that your God would see that as a form of sodomy and deem you an abomination?  Worry no more, now there is a way to release those dammed up demons from inside with the loving touch of Christ with Chick-Fil-A's all new enemas.  Dan Cathy decided rather than recycling his used oil that fried the ever so delicious chicken fillets, he can bottle it and resell it to his patrons that get constipated from showing their support for traditional marriage by consuming countless chicken sandwiches. It's a simple process, after every shift, the oil cools and is funneled into a plastic bottle, boxed up and shipped out across America to pharmacies to be sold daily.  The oil works better than the standard saline solution because of its natural lubrication properties.  Now you don't have to worry about a reach around denying you the gates of heaven resulting in an overwhelming show of support for Santorum.

Also in the works from Chick-Fil-A Labs is the Chick-Fil-A Colostomy Bag, with waffle fries.  It doubles up as a food & waste carrier, be sure that is the BBQ sauce you're dipping those nuggets in.

Disclaimer: The author has no ties to the workings of Chick-Fil-A and has no knowledge of inner workings of the company. This is satirical opinion, in my opinion that Chick-Fil-A is full of shit.